Arrancars CHRISTMAS SPECIAL!
by Kurosaki Neko
Summary: Aizen wanted to spread the holiday joy to every of his fellow Arrancars to organize Secret Santa for everyone so enjoy! XD T for strong language.
1. Chapter 1

Espada Christmas Story

[Espada Meeting Room, Las Noches]

"My dear Espada, I have summoned all of you today since I wanted to announced that we are celebrating Christmas this year in Las Noches," announced Aizen. Aaroniero raises his hand, in Kaien Form. "Yes, Novena Espada," said Aizen. "My lord, what is Christmas, exactly?" asked the confused Novena. "Good question, I will now explain it to you since you are new to Christmas, Kaname, please turn on the projector," asked Aizen, signaled hand to do so. The projector displayed images of humans celebrating Christmas.

"Gin knows very well about the Christmas holiday, so please explain, my dear Gin," implied Aizen. "Okay, Captain Aizen!" said Gin, as he brought out his teaching baton. As Gin explained on Christmas, images on it flashed on the screen, "Christmas is a special celebration when human Christians celebrated their Lord and Savior Birthday, Jesus Christ," explained Gin, "People usually celebrate by decorating their houses into the holiday colours which green, white and red, putting up a Evergreen known as the Christmas tree and decorated with ornaments, ribbons and such, having many delicious meals like eggnog, mashed potatoes and fruit cakes and the most fun of all you can receive gifts from the one and only Santa!"

Awkward silence as Gin waited for a response, "I guess you people don't Santa," sighed Gin, "Well I will explain, Santa Clause is a wonderful human that goes to everybody houses at night and gives them exciting presents." Szayel raised his hand, Gin pointed the baton at him in response, "Yes, ya question?" said Gin. "How come a human like that visits to everyone houses in one night? He must be a master of sonido to do that," asked Szayel. "Well, he can because he's some kinda of magical being that spread happiness in every way," answered Gin, filled with enthusiasm. Szayel however felt quite uneasy with that answer since he's a man of science and there's no such thing as magic but didn't tend to ask anymore question because of Gin's stupidity.

Nnoitra raised his hand, "Yes, what's ya question," Gin pointed his baton at the Quinto. "How the hell does this "Santa" able to break into people houses and get away with it and the people doesn't mind at all? Maybe he could poison their food or make hell of a mess at their living room?" asked Nnoitra, seemly unimpressed. "Nnoitra, Santa is a good guy, he will never do and I don't know the people just accept him being their houses," said frustrated Gin, "Anyway, any more questions?" No raised their hands.

"Okay, no more questions, Aizen you're good to go," said Gin finally. "Gin, Tousen and I have enjoyed our Christmas at Seireitei and decided to share this wonderful experience to all and since I am your Lord and Savior, I will grant the permission to celebrate Christmas together as one," said Aizen, joyfully. Coughing and shifting chairs occurs. "Since Santa can't reach here in Hueco Mundo, we will have a "Secret Santa" between the Espada, Privaron Espada, Fraccions, Exequias and other Arrancars," said Aizen, more coughing and shifting chairs. "Never mind I will give everyone a memo on that and on that Christmas party's date, for now you're dismissed," said Aizen finally. Every Espada got up from their chairs and walked back to their chambers."

Memo to everyone:

'_Dear my fellow servants,_

_We will be celebrating Christmas this year and Christmas is a time to get jolly and happy to simplify it. Santa Clause is the most crucial part in Christmas, he is a human that gives everyone a present in one night (don't question it), since he can't travel all the way to Hueco Mundo we will hold an event called "Secret Santa" which you must give a gift to the person you wanted to give but you give him/her on the Christmas party that will be held in 4 days (that you give enough time to think at least…..) But the person you will be giving the present to will be selected in that star shaped box in the middle of the Throne Room, you must not take more than 1 name and you must choose honestly (or else we might electrical you*evil smirk*). Also you must all buy one gift for Gin, Tousen and I as it is a must. So Good Luck Shopping!_

_Your Lord,_

_Sosuke Aizen' _

The first one to came upon the Throne Room was Starrk and Lilynette, Starrk seems want to get over this quickly. Later Ulquiorra came and a little while Zommari. Then, Szayel accompany by his Fraccions along with his older brother, Yylfordt. Then, Aaroniero and few minutes later Menoly and Loly. Harribel and her arguing 3 Fraccions. Grimmjow and Nnoitra along their Fraccions. Yammy and his pet dog, Kukkapūro. The 3 Privaron Espada and Rudbornn. Baraggan and his Fraccion carried him on his throne. Aisslinger and Demoura. Finally Nel and her brother-like brothers.

So now here's the questions: "Who's giving who?"


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Cirucci's Worse Shopping Experience

(Everyone is all in Arrancar Proof Gigais, just to explain)(+If they wear Gigais their patterns and mask fragment on their heads/faces disappear)

[New York Shopping Center, New York City]

Cirucci was getting really annoyed as he walked over the busy, cold night streets of New York. The first was her paper read the weirdest and the only Arrancar she doesn't know very much about which was: _'Aaroniero Arruruerie'_

The second was that she hadn't been to the World of the Living often and was quite dazed to where to go but luckily the Privarons was able get help from a human officer who question about Gantenbainne's and Dordoni's weird and bizarre appearances but Cirucci tend dodge those kind of questions about their unrealistic looks. And the final problem was that her two partners kept making a fuss that attracted a lot of attention and she doesn't like attention like the time she fought a male Soul Reaper and he hadn't been focusing at all because he had been paying attention to her panties than her. She was quite upset that day, which she started to wear armor under her short skirt but it wasn't really comfortable at all. Well, she thought that being fashionable needed its sacrifice.

"I wanted to ask you two again, why do you need to pick the most lame and outdated outfits of all of the Gigai's personal storage?!" asked Cirucci, quite distressed. She was wearing a brown fur winter coat and brown winter skirt along with some black ear muffs, black scarf, black winter gloves and red winter boots. "Why not? It seem pretty cool to us," answered Dordoni. He wore a white fur coat vest; a blue shirt said "I love LADIES" what he wore inside of the vest along with weird Zebra pattern winter pants along with neon green winter boots and a pink bandanna saying "PEACE!". "What's wrong about loving "The Beatles"?" asked Gantenbainne. He wore a big strangely coloured fur coat saying "The Beatle ROCKS!" and black leather stripped pants along with dark red winter legging winter shoes and some kind of Hollywood style sunglasses.

"But don't you see that we are attracting a ton of attention because of you two," implied Cirucci, in frustration. "So what?" asked both of them. "Lord Aizen's number rule of entering the World of the Living is to not attract attention since the Soul Reapers might suspect something funny," pointed out Cirucci, losing her patient. "Well, Lord Aizen kicked us out because he thinks we're too much star quality for him to handle," stated Dordoni. Gantenbainne argued in a grunt. "I'm just losing it here!" finally gave out a yell. That moment everyone stopped and looked the group.

As they continue walking, Cirucci was quite embarrassed on that moment that she lost her temper in public, it happen before when Szayel kept pissing her off about her breast's size. She was blushing bright red from that time until now. "And who says that we are the only that attracted attention," said Gantenbainne, gave out a chuckle with Dordoni. "Just shut up and give me ideas on want to give that weird octopus freak," said Cirucci, trying to calm herself down. "Is that way to call your superior?" joked Dordoni, still chuckling. "Would you two cut the jokes already and help me out?!" spat out angered Cirucci, "And by the way, he's such a weakling, why would Lord Aizen kick him out not me, I just don't get it. "Maybe it had something to do with you nagging to Lord Aizen about your salary in our Espada's days," insisted Gantenbainne, cheerfully, "You're kinda stingy so maybe that's way he preferred cheap fish over an expensive fly." "Don't ever make fun of my sexy Resurrección or else! And Aizen was the one being stingy!" implied Cirucci. "Ya,ya, whatever you say Ms. Fly Queen," said Dordoni. "I warned you!" said Cirucci. She kicked both of them in the crotch and as they screamed and both ended up crying on the streets. "Our manhood…" T^T

[Crowded Shopping Mall, New York City]

"Well, he maybe he like sushi?" suggested Dordoni. "Really sushi? I l know he has a tentacle for a hand but seriously sushi? If he liked sushi, who would give sushi to someone as a present?," said Cirucci ,"And do you guys notice that we have been with the Espada when we and Aaroniero was around and didn't even opened up to us by just keep staying at the dark like some kind weirdo." "That's it! Maybe he needed some lights in his dark unknown emo life," suggested Gantenbainne. "You kinda on to something here but I got a bad feeling about this but I never cared about that dork anyway," said Cirucci, "Now I needed to give a gift to Lord Aizen, Gin and Tousen, what about you two? Who are your Secret Santa or whatever it's called?" asked Cirucci. "Well, remember that weird Arrancar lady living next to Rudbornn's dorm?" said Gantenbainne. "Yes and about her?" replied Cirucci, curious. "Well, she's my Sercet Santa and I was thinking to give her something Nnoitra's relate," said Gantenbainne. "Why is that?" said Dordoni. "Well, she kept talking to me about him and I don't even know her, she's seriously creeping me out so maybe if I can make her happy maybe she won't be a weird stalker and stopped talking to me," pointed out Gantenbainne. "Also to add that my Sercet Santa is her younger sister which keeps talking to me about Szayel and I was thinking the same, too" said Dordoni.

"What a weird Arrancars and didn't even know you and just talked to you, does Rudbornn know about their weird obsession on Nnoitra and Szayel since I heard they're good friends," asked Cirucci. "Actually, we have no idea…."said Gantenbainne and Dordoni. Awkward silence went by. "Ok, let's not start talking about weird Arrancars living next door and go back to shopping!" Cirucci broke the awkward silence since it was getting too awkward. "YES!" responded both of her companions. (Just to get out of the awkwardness).

"A disco ball for Aaroniero, an album called "What does the fox say" for Gin, a superman action figure for Tousen and the only thing left is Lord Aizen's gift" said Cirucci, carrying shopping bags with her fellow comrades. "Dudes, I got the awesome idea ever!" exclaimed Gantenbainne. "What?" said Cirucci. "Maybe we could give the most expensive and awesome gift for Lord Aizen and he might like it so much that he will put us back in the Espada again," excited Gantenbainne. "That's a good idea! I can't wait to be an Espada again," danced Dordoni. "That's great but we need…."she got interrupted by announcement made by the megaphone.

"_ATTENTION CUMSTOMERS, WE WILL BE HAVING A 90-95% DISCOUNT OF ALL STORES IN THIS MALL AS A YEAR END SPECIAL, THE EVENT WILL START 3,2,1 GO!"_

Everybody started rushing in to every store. "Great, a discount will save us money on Lord Aizen's gift!" yelled Gantenbainne. "What are you waiting my friend! Let's GO!" shouted Dordoni. Both of them rushed toward the crowd but Cirucci was suffocating in the rushing crowd of people. "GANTENBAINNE! DORDONI! LORD AIZEN! HELP ME!" she yelled as she got squashed into the horror of madness of just a discount, as she was forgotten by her friends for a discount. "YOU GUYS ARE THE WORST COMRADES I EVER MET!" cried helpless Cirucci. T^T

Tired Cirucci was able to survive the mess as the Privarons walked back to a secure place to open their way home. Her clothes were quite a mess but she didn't care since she just wanted to go home. "So why did you bought Lord Aizen in the end?" asked Dordoni. "I was able to get this hair gel called "Sexy Free" for him" said exhausted Cirucci. "Did you check the ingredients on the back?" he asked. "What?! Do we need to know the ingredients on the back too!?" she shrieked, "Why?" "The announcer said there might me weird stuff in there did you hear that?" asked Gantenbainne. "I was buried under a crap ton of people how could I notice?" said Cirucci, "I will check it anyway." She turned over the case to find that something disgusting. "What's wrong?" asked Dordoni. "Rhino shit? Who would add rhino shit in a hair gel?" exclaimed Cirucci. "Dunno, maybe a crappy company?" replied both of them. "It's crap alright but nevermind, I can't go back there it's like hell, just keep it a secret to Lord Aizen that I gave him rhino shit for his hair, okay?"

"Ok." As they chuckled.

"Let's go home, I don't want visit the Living World ever again!"


End file.
